Diana was not able to get her infusion today. Her white blood cell counts were OK, but her platelet count was too low. They want her to be at or above 100 and she was at 54. It is not so low that they would do a platelet transfusion, which is the only way to bring the platelet counts up other than waiting, but low enough that they didn’t want to proceed.
Since her her blood counts were OK, she won't need to get Zarxio injections next week. She'll rest this week and hopefully be able to resume treatment next Friday if her platelet and white blood cell counts stay up. On the plus side, she'll have a little more energy to celebrate Hannah’s birthday on Monday. Her oncologist was out of town this week and unable to talk with him directly so we'll wait until next week to better understand what this all means for her overall treatment plan.
Thank you for the prayers and support. Our family has been blessed by so many wonderful people!
Thursday: Thursday was the one weekday I was not scheduled to be in the cancer clinic, but unfortunately the worst of the side effects from the Zarxio injections hit that day — lots of pain in my lower back, hips, and joints. I wanted to be with the kids since I had been gone so much, so we decided to go swimming and we had a marvelous time! The water actually supported my weight so I felt little to no pain while I bobbed around the pool for about an hour with the kids. First time to put sunscreen on my head. ;)
Friday: Glen and I met with Dr. Curley before my scheduled infusion time. He did a breast exam first and was happy to see good progress with the tumor. He could hardly feel the inflammation in my lymph nodes and the tumor felt like it had reduced more than two centimeters in size. He was happy with that response and feels like we are right on track.
He is concerned about my white blood cell counts. We asked him how the cancelled infusions will affect the progress of my treatments. He said one or two cancellations will not be problematic but he does not want that to happen anymore so he is going to have me continue with the Zarxio injections every Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday. If things stabilize, we will adjust as needed.
We also talked a lot about my susceptibility to COVID right now. We are trying to make some decisions about the kids schooling and wanted the doctor's input. We are anxious for Ryan to have a senior year and Kate to experience her freshman year along with the other kids, but after talking with the doctor we have decided to have them all do online school until my chemo treatments are completed. We feel peace about that.
I headed into the chemo room to get blood draws and was so happy to see my neutrophils at 3.83! A big improvement from last week when they were 0.3. My red blood cells, hemoglobin, and platelets were all low. Usually, doctors like platelets to be above 100 and I was 93, but he gave the ok for the infusion today given my strong white blood cell count. So grateful for answered prayers and a priesthood blessing! My nurse started the Benadryl, Zofran, Pepcid, steroids, and Taxol. I was able to have just half the Benadryl dose again without any adverse reaction. I always get nauseated from the start and my mouth tastes like metal but with some deep breathing and relaxation I was able to keep everything down. I continue to suck on ice chips while the Taxol is given to help prevent mouth sores.
I came home to rest and felt like I could have slept the entire day but I got up after a few hours so I would be able to sleep tonight, to eat something, and to be with the family. Another infusion complete! Thank you for helping make that happen with your faith and prayers.
Today (Wednesday), I had the last of my three injections of Zarxio. They ended up giving me the injections in the back of my arms; it was only painful when they tried to inject the medication too quickly. On Monday, I had minimal side effects, but by Tuesday, I felt a lot of fatigue and now understand where the expression "bone tired" comes from. My doctor said that doesn’t surprise him based on how hard my body is working to generate the new blood cells.
Today, I felt more achiness in my lower back and hips but, for the most part, it's been manageable with the Claritin and Aleve. I've had less nausea due to not having my infusion last Friday, so I've been able to eat mostly normal and gain back some of the weight that I lost.
If all goes well, my white blood cells will be up by Friday and I'll be able to move forward with my infusion around noon. David was unsure if Dr. Curley would want to get these injections on a regular basis or just when my blood cell counts are too low.
The house has been a little more lively with all the kids back this week. They really enjoyed spending time with their cousins the last two weeks in Utah and escaping this mild (only up to 116) summer in Phoenix. I'm still trying to beat the worst of the heat and walk in the morning, but it's over 80 degrees no matter when I walk. Very grateful for air conditioning and modern medicine.
My new chemo socks! Today, my fight was emotional instead of physical.
Well, today didn't go as we had planned, but isn’t that the way life works most of the time?!
I went in for my infusion at 10:30am and waited for almost 45 minutes before I was called back for blood work. It was a busy day in the chemo room and several people, including my friend Meredith, had adverse reactions to the drugs they were getting. My nurse said there must have been a blue-light special on allergic reactions ;). One man was covered in ice packs and talking to an emergency doctor. Meredith was getting the same drug (Taxol) I was scheduled to get and started feeling like she was going to pass out. Her vision was blurred and her face flushed and became red hot. Thankfully, they were able to bring her blood pressure up as they flushed her with saline, and administered the drug slower and with more steroids.
During all the excitement, I was waiting for my blood results. Yvette asked me if Glen has already left and said that I might want to call him back. She said my numbers looked very low but that she hadn’t been able to talk with Dr. Curley, who was with another patient. I waited while they attended to others reactions and then they were able to reach Dr. Curley via text and Skype. Several numbers were low, but my white blood cell count was 1.4 and my neutrophils were 0.32.
The last time my infusion was cancelled due to low white blood cells, my numbers were 2.4 and .62, so I knew I was in trouble. The nurses got word that I was not to proceed with the infusion, and that next week I was to come in on Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday to get injections of Zarxio into my stomach. Zarxio is a drug that will stimulate my bone marrow to produce white blood cells and help prevent infections. It can cause bone pain and body aches, so I will be taking Claritin and Aleve for five days to help with the side effects. If my white blood cells increase after Wednesday, I'll be able to have the infusion I was scheduled for today next Friday at 12:30pm.
As you can imagine, I felt discouraged after getting this news. It's really emotional gearing up for another treatment just as I begin to recover from the side effects of the previous week. I asked Glen how I would ever be able to fight this cancer if my body couldn’t handle the chemo. After a good lunch, a rest, and a cry, I asked Glen if he would give me a priesthood blessing. Glen and Paul anointed my head with consecrated oil and used the power of God to bless my body to respond to these injections and be strengthened to receive my chemotherapy treatments.
I know God’s power to heal and bless exists on the earth today through the priesthood, worthily used. But what if my blood counts don’t come up? Does that mean this priesthood power is not real? I was reminded today that my belief is not in whether or not the blessings I desire come to pass. My belief is in Jesus Christ and his perfect, all-knowing power to guide my life, to console my spirit, and to succor for MY sins, and to experience MY pain and afflictions.
As Glen placed his hands upon my head, I felt God place his hands around my heart and remind me that He is in control and that all these things will work for my good. This is what I am grateful for today.
This song brought me peace today when I felt too sick to get out of bed.
Though Satan should buffet, though trials should come, Let this blest assurance control, That Christ has regarded my helpless estate, And hath shed His own blood for my soul.
My infusion yesterday went well. Since we knew it would take about four hours, my mom dropped me off at the clinic and returned home and I called her to come back shortly before I was done. I got the results from the metabolic panel, which indicated that I was high in my glucose and BUN/creatinine ratio but that was not concerning to the nurses and did not prevent me from going ahead with chemo. I will get some more clarification on what that means when I meet with David or Dr. Curley next week. They did a second blood test right before the infusion and those results looked good. My platelets were lower than last week (109 to 100) but my white blood cells that fight infection were up almost a point higher (1.34 to 2.36).
Due to the clinic being closed on July 4th, the chemo room was very busy — there were twice as many patients so the infusion took a little longer. The nurses definitely earned their day off! I had the nurse Diana working with me. She is one of my favorites, not just because she has a cool name ;), but because she is so sweet and willing to help in anyway. I found out that she used to attend the same church as our family, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, and that several of her children have attended seminary. After going through a difficult divorce, she stopped going to church. I loved getting to know her better. She gave me permission to cut my Benadryl dose in half so it wouldn’t make me so tired and loopy for the rest of the day. It was much better, and we may even be able to cut it back a little more next week.
I sat next to my friend Meredith who I met last week when she was getting her first infusion. She has been on oral chemo for the past two years. She was diagnosed with breast cancer in 2016, went through treatment, then it metastasized and two years later the cancer spread to her other breast and organs. She will most likely be on some kind of chemo for the rest of her life. She cut her hair short during the past week and we talked about her reaction to her first infusion. She was so sad when she got her blood test results back, which showed she was too low to have treatment. :( I could totally understand her emotions after my experience two weeks ago.
After she left, another woman named Mary came in for her last treatment. She was really talkative and eating food the entire time. She told me all about her three kids, one of which is in prison for dealing drugs. She talked about a wig she was getting, and totally made me laugh when she told me how excited she was to get “a pot card that would be good for two years!” I am making all kinds of new friends. ;)
The remainder of the time, I rested, texted a bit, and read my scriptures. By the time I got home, it was about 5pm and I was very tired and nauseated. I laid down for a bit, and then had a little soup and toast. Sucking on broth, smoothies, baby food pouches, and hard candies for nausea have all helped. If I am very careful with my eating, it all stays down. Mom is taking great care of me and went to the store to get me some saltines and bananas. I took a couple melatonin before bed to try and help me sleep Thursday night.
Glen, Rebekah, Paul, and Ryan will be home on Sunday, and my mom will fly back to Utah on Wednesday. Hope you all have a marvelous Fourth of July celebration. My next infusion will be Friday, June 10th. Feeling blessed!
Last week was a bit hairy, no pun intended, so I wanted to recap a few things that happened.
I had been told by my oncologist that I would begin losing my hair 2 to 4 weeks after treatment began, but until the June 19, I saw no apparent signs of hair loss. I normally have a lot of hair, so I wondered if perhaps I might just lose a portion of my hair instead of all of it. On Friday, however, I started to see bits of hair coming out throughout the day and by Monday it was quite apparent that things weren’t stopping — every time I pulled up my hair, handfuls of hair were coming out. This was emotional for me. I would have been ready to shave my hair at that point but we had already arranged to take family pictures on Wednesday. So, I did my best to baby my hair along without washing or combing it, hoping we could make it last a few more days. With a lot of help from my dear friend and hairdresser, she helped me style it in such a way that you couldn’t see any patches or balding and my niece did an outstanding job capturing our family together. We are so grateful to have those memories!
📷: Cassandra Brown Photography
The next morning, June 25th, I had an appointment to check out a wig shop. Previously, I didn’t think I would use a wig, but after talking to several breast cancer survivors who shared how much having a wig helped them, I decided to look into it. Wigs, especially those made of real hair, can be pricey, but I had a prescription from my oncologist for a “cranial prosthesis” based on my diagnosis. Our insurance would not cover the cost, but we found out about a wonderful organization called “Don’t be a chump, check for a lump” that provided $250 toward a wig after a short application process. Before I lost my hair, I wanted to see if anything might match my original color and texture. Glen, my friend, and I had a great time trying on wigs of all colors and lengths and finally decided to order a heat-resistant synthetic wig that seemed to fit my personality, and I plan to use it along with scarves and other head coverings.
Glen and I wanted the family to be together at home when we shaved my hair, so the kids coordinated their work schedules so that everyone could be home after our appointment at the wig shop. We picked up Chick-fil-A and, after eating, my hairdresser and all of the kids helped to cut my hair. I wanted to donate my hair to children with hair loss due to cancer and other medical reasons, so I was able to about 10 inches to Children With Hair Loss. Hannah wanted to know if she could help, so we pulled my hair up into small ponytails and each of the kids got to cut one or two off. We didn’t want this experience to be frightening for anyone, so we tried to make it fun and incorporate everyone’s ideas and we really had a marvelous afternoon!
Glen, Ryan, and Daniel all really wanted to show their support by cutting their hair so we cut their hair after mine. Paul had also considered cutting his hair but I could tell that he was having a hard time seeing me without my hair and I reassured him that he did not need to shave his head for me to feel his love and support. He decided not to shave and I was grateful no one felt pressure to do that. The girls had also spent the morning tinting the bottoms of their hair pink so that by the time we were all done our family looked completely different. We spent the next couple of days thinking of all the perks of having no hair — all of the time and expense of coloring and cutting, no more shampoo and conditioner, how fast it is to shower and get ready. Everyone was very positive. As we have embraced this temporary change in our appearance, we have been reminded of how insignificant the trappings of this life really are and how little they define us. Thursday evening my wonderful mom flew into town from Utah to stay with me while the kids got ready for an Andersen family reunion. Friday morning, before my infusion, Glen and I met with Dr. Curley to review my progress from the past three weeks. I was very happy to report that I could feel my tumor getting smaller and we discussed some questions I had. Dr. Curley was confident that my blood counts would be up and that we could move forward with the dosages and treatment he had originally planned. When we got my blood tests back, turned out that he was right! We spent the rest of Friday helping pack the family up and getting camping supplies ready and then they left for Manti Saturday morning.
This week:
Here's the new wig! Still trying to figure out how to get it on straight and style it, but I feel like it looks pretty natural.
Our home has never been so quiet and clean! My mom and I enjoyed a wonderful Sabbath Day taking the sacrament, reading, and baking. She came with all kinds of recipes that we could try to help with my nausea and nutrition and to fatten me up! I am so grateful for her service as we have stripped bedding, washed laundry and run errands. I continue to walk each morning and have loved getting updates from Glen and the kids at the reunion. I have felt a huge outpouring of love from the Andersens as they have prayed, colored their hair pink, shaved heads, and worn pink bracelets.
Today, I picked up the wig I had ordered and had blood work done in preparation for my infusion tomorrow. Because of the 4th of July, the clinic will be closed on Friday, so I will go in a day earlier to receive an infusion of Carboplatin, Taxol, Keytruda. This last cycle was my hardest round of chemo, but we have figured out a few things that I think will help me to feel better tomorrow.
I have been reminded today in undeniable ways that the Lord always provides the ways for us to endure our challenges, often through other people.
